Learning To Love From Within

Christi Carlton Uncategorized
Christi Blog

What does it mean to love yourself?  To love yourself you must first forgive yourself, forgive others, be good to yourself, and be inspired.  You are worthy of all that you desire.  May your road to happiness begin today.

Love Yourself 

First and foremost, realize that you are special, you are unique, and you were put here on this Earth to serve a mission. You are worthy of love! You are worthy of happiness! Love yourself, love yourself, love yourself! I can think of a million reasons why you should love yourself, but the most important one is this. People who love themselves shine brighter and live more inspired lives than those who do not love themselves.

I spent many years arguing with a voice inside my head that kept trying to convince me I was not good enough for various things. I fought for many years until one day I couldn’t any longer. When I gave into the feelings of doubt and self-pity, I gave up on loving myself. Eventually I had enough of the negative self-talk and dug deep to really find out who I was again and began to transform back to a state of truly loving who I am. Over time I learned to say kind things to myself and punch negativity in the face! Think about it, have you ever noticed that when you are happy, positive, and carefree others are attracted to you? Conversely, when you are in a negative place and entrenched in sadness, people avoid you. When you practice loving yourself, eventually you get to a place where the love is unconditional and there is no need to convince yourself everyday that you are amazing, you just know you are!

Here’s what I want you to do. Take a picture of yourself and say out loud all of the things you appreciate and think are beautiful!  Honor yourself fully. Now callout something you would like to change and find a way to laugh at it. The ability to laugh at ourselves makes us stronger and less likely to give a crap about what other people think!

Forgive Yourself and Others 

Forgive yourself for all the mistakes you have made, all the phone calls you never returned, all the harsh words you have ever spoken, and all the other things that cause you to harbor guilt. Forgive those who hurt you in the past. Forgive those that treated you unkindly and most of all, forgive those who have never apologized. Say out loud, “I forgive myself for these things and I will no longer harbor guilt. The past is the past and I will move forward with a new perspective. I forgive those who have hurt me and I will no longer harbor sadness as a result of their actions. I am free to live an amazing life and no one can stop me.”

Ask yourself honestly, “What can I forgive myself for?”  Write it down or say it out loud. Sometimes all you need to do is hear it or see it to realize you no longer need to harbor this idea any longer. Let it go and go forward.

Be Good to Yourself and Be Inspired

Grab a piece of paper, your phone, or tablet and make a list right now of 5 – 10 things you can do today to bring you happiness and joy.  Everyday make time to enjoy these areas of your life! If you don’t get to all of them each day, it’s ok, forgive yourself and move on. This is not a test, but it is important to keep perspective on your life and making it a priority to do the things that bring you happiness.    My “Inspired” list has many things on it. Some examples are laughing with my friends, playing with my son, enjoying a glass of wine, making jewelry, writing, yoga, meditation, public speaking, my coaching practice, listening to music and staying connected with my family.    Do something every single day that makes you feel good, whether it is changing your thought patterns or taking a hot bubble bath. Maybe it’s reading a great book or listening to music. Whatever it is for you, make time to do it. You don’t need hours. As little as 10 minutes a day can change your life!

Accept that you are indeed the source of many wonderful things. If you need help remembering what they are from time to time, keep making your feel good lists. Keep coming back to the love that is inherently yours. It is your birthright. And so it is.

Be good to yourself. You will train other people to do the same. The way you treat yourself sets an expectation for how others should treat you. If you don’t tolerate negative self-talk, you won’t tolerate it from others either. Being good to yourself and loving who you are will open your ability to filter out so much BS in the world. Let the stress go, let all the things that do not serve you go. Free yourself of the life you don’t want and breath life into how you want to live. Where you focus your attention breed’s growth. Focus on the positive change in your life will produce positive results. Go after it with all that you are! You are amazing! Show the world what’s been hiding inside of you all along.

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